and so, zoom and boom, december is almost halfway through. time is like a galloping moose these days. doesn't help that i had a nasty flu for over a week and before that there were some bad (as in worst ever) migraines. been in bed a lot, or at least confined to my home, so today it felt almost exotic to be out and about during the day. i went to the library, pet supply store and supermarket, left when the sun was rising, came home with it setting. daylight hours are few now, and the days shortening still. the air was chilly and a bit windy, but not too much. quite lovely, actually. everything was covered in a feathery frost.

i can't wait for 2016 to be over, and i know i'm not alone in this. it wasn't all bad, on the contrary there were many things i look back to with fondness. the searing sadnesses and shocks not so much... but most of all 2017 just looks more promising already. i will be doing some very interesting translating, of which more in the spring, and should be getting my personal ducks, if not in a row, then at least lolling about in one pond...

here's my darling sysi having some tasty porridge and pudding...

...oh wait, the naughty boy pushed the healthy bits aside and went straight for the vanilla custard with spirulina! (or is he just saving the best for last?)

most of my photos of the rats are dim and dark now, and i don't like to blast their sensitive eyes with the flash so it can't be helped. popcorn paused savu long enough to capture more than a blur. they do eat salad and veggies, too, and the new 'diet' is keeping them active, but we are all partial to treats in this household...

savu still has his tumour, by the way, but it has been growing so slowly that i opted against surgery at this point. not an easy decision either way but i feel like it is best for now. if anaesthetics were a lesser risk, i would've had the growth snipped in the bud, but savu was a smaller boy then and he has had respiratory sounds since he was a baby (so not myco, possibly just a nasal passage thing) and all in all i just had a strong gut feeling he would not pull through. if it ever starts to bother him then that's another matter but i hope he never has to go through that.

both are showing signs of becoming cuddlier with age. savu lets me pet him more and more, even asks for it, and tonight sysi was so happy after getting a bite from a potato chip that he stayed leaning against my hip (still not a lap rat!) while i scratched his neck for way longer than ever before. i almost thought he might fall asleep and stay. not this time but i have faith...

netflix sent me an e-mail today, saying they've added a show i might like. sure, except i watched the entire dirk gently's holistic detective agency yesterday already. it was quite captivating and really well done. i liked the casting a lot, too.

fingers crossed i get to go to the woods this week. i really want a yule spruce this year.

november, you're already going?

we had a tiny winter, then a lot of rain. now there is snow again, for the time being. my mood has lifted and plummeted with the weather. now i'm feeling better, but overtired from last weekend. big house parties just aren't for me, despite wanting to enjoy the great company it ends up draining all of my energy. even three friends over for tea (mushroom cocoa, really) afterwards was a bit much. the good thing about a crowd, before all the swooshing, overbearing energy gets to me, is that i can step back and be around people without actually having to be the target of a lot of attention from a bunch of people at once. i do like that, every once in a long while... looking at people being happy and social. just don't try to force me into playing that game. eventually there's always someone who spots the 'loner' and either they are themselves lonely or just worried you're too shy to join in, and insist on trying to chat or 'cheer you up'. it can't be helped, i guess.

i thought i could drink green tea again, but turns out i can't. sleep has been an issue again. too little, too much, at the wrong hours, you name it. i also dropped dairy and eggs from my diet, might as well be as picky as can get... actually it really got to me that i'm paying other people to do things i could never do to animals, taking calves from mother cows and killing anyone deemed unprofitable. i love cheese and chocolate and ice cream and, dammit, butter, but i can no longer truly enjoy such 'treats'. and i'm not suddenly all blissed out and without cravings. going to the supermarket is agony with its temptations. there are more and more product options for a gluten intolerant vegan, but a lot of 'substitute' food items are still gross. vegan cheeses taste awful to me, like margarine, which is also on my icky list. very few chocolates left to choose from. and commercial nice creams... well, we'll see if a taste for those can be aquired.

these are very much first world problems, i am aware if that. but they are my small world problems now. enjoying edible things is a big part of my life. besides, i eat a lot. i decided i would still eat vegetarian food when offered, but i won't buy dairy or eggs anymore. honey is okay to me, my friends keep bees. and i'm not throwing away my vintage leather clothing or skeins of wool either. but i will stop buying yarn for now, unless i need it to finish something. it was becoming a problem anyway. i'm hoping for clarity. and health.

lots and lots of snowy, crisp winter days, too.

october has been grey, but dry. i've had no energy whatsoever. every week feels like it only lasts two or three days. i can't keep up.

i haven't been able to find a decent video editing app that would work on my tablet, and all i really need is to snip out uninteresting bits in between action sequences and maybe tweak the light a little. this is a funny clip of sysi but it would benefit from some trimming...

 

yesterday was stormy, and as i was about to leave to my japanese class the sky just burst with rain and i didn't feel like swimming there, so i stayed home and tried to study on my own. well, with a little help from my friends, of course...

in case the embedded video doesn't work, here's the link. i don't seem to have any options to edit how the video appears on this page, like before. i would've wanted to slo-mo the very end but didn't know how to do that, either.

the sticker survived, by the way. here it is on another notebook now:

maple in the old cemetery

eteläpitkäkatu

one of my favourite fall activities is having an evening walk in the old town, taking in all the different kinds of wood smoke scents drifting from the chimneys. the weather has been warmer than usual so not everyone has fires going yet, but i caught some autumnal whiffs this evening already. friday and saturday are the most fragrant, that's when all the saunas are being heated and used, it's a gorgeous mix of smoke, birch leaves and suds. that's a year-round indulgence of course, and available in most residential areas. the combination of chilly air, cobblestone streets and the smoke is so lovely, though, and i'm really looking forward to it.

i have started yoga and japanese classes, it's a strange feeling to be a student again after so many years, with homework and all. even though i have learned japanese on my own before, and know how to read most of the kana, it's funny how the brain switches gears upon studying. i find myself more fluent just like that, even though the classes have just begun and we have only been through a few hiragana. i have been playing a game on my tablet called 'pocketland' for a good while almost every day, but now all of a sudden i am comprehending much more. curious, isn't it? i thought it might be frustrating to go through things i know already, and at such slow pace, too, but it's actually kind of nice. my old notebook is so intimidating and crazy, i started by diving into the deep end and copied and translated, the best i could, a 'mori girl' magazine. that's kind of my thing, skipping the basics and going straight at the hard stuff. so the classes are new to me in that sense, having to be patient and more focused.

sysi moriarty & savu aomori

the ratty boys are turning a year old already! sysi has his birthday tomorrow and savu's is next week, on the fifth. tomorrow is a bittersweet celebration, since it's also the anniversary of a painful decision to have my old boy basu put to sleep the following day... i'm so glad i decided to adopt these two rascals despite specifically intending not to. i know they will, in turn, break my heart when they go, but what really matters is the here and now, and boy are they good at that. they are my sensei and they have been such a great consolation through my losses this past year. they just make my heart burst with love and joy no matter what.

last week i finally got a proper forest fix, and not just once but twice. i went back to forest home on three days, and the first trip was dedicated to mushrooming. there were crazy many. my first basketful filled before i was even officially in the woods, and i had to go back to the house to unload a bunch of funnel chanterelles before heading out again. the above is what i came back with the second time. ahh, good times...

hygrocybe coccinea

there had been some cooler nights, which always seems to bring out the waxcaps. there were white and yellow ones by our trashbin, and these fiery red ones by the logging road. they would've been edible, but there were only a few and my basket was already brimming...

i also picked and juiced a ton of apples one afternoon, i'm hoping to make some cider vinegar also. in this particular glass there was also siberian blackberry and nettle. so, so delicious. i never drink commercial apple juice but i love it freshly squeezed from garden varieties, the more in the mix the better. rowan berries also add a nice punch to the flavour. if there's time, i'm making more this week.

on saturday we went foraging in the nearby nature preserve omenapuumaa (apple tree land. there are wild apple trees, although we spotted none, but apparently the name comes from swedish åminnebo, referring to a dwelling by the mouth of a river.) with a couple of friends. i've been wanting to go for a long time, and the place did not disappoint. we had the best weather, warm but not too hot, and windy enough to keep mosquitoes at bay. for a small area, there were lots of different nature types, and all kinds of fungi all over the place, up in trees and under the roots of fallen ones. these blue-gray polypores were perhaps the most beautiful.

underneath some other polypores were these droplets of evaporation from the fungus itself. i wish i had brought a camera, these cell phone shots don't really do the mushrooms justice. my friend hanna took a picture of me taking this photo...

i left my basket at home so had to borrow a bucket. it's not ideal for mushrooms but it did a good job containing my haul. there were orange milkcaps, funnel chanterelles, various russulas and lots of gypsy mushrooms. i also found a chunk of chaga and took a birch polypore, which probably was against the rules but it was for a good cause, both fungi are medicinal, with anti-tumor properties, and they are for the rats, savu especially with his lumpy leg.

possibly a honey fungus

lepiota sp.

lycoperdon perlatum

lycogala epidendron

we had our picnic on a little beach, and while we were eating, a couple rowed a boat ashore from the neighbouring island, informing us they had spent the night in the small, red house we had been admiring. turns out it is a rental cottage, without electricity but very comfy, and the fee sounded reasonable enough for me to start planning a stay...

the second leg of our trek took us on some cliffs with pines and spots of abundant crowberries. i had to tear myself away, but with a handful in my pocket. they were so plump and nice... then there were all kinds of groves, one stretch of the path reminded me so much of ireland my heart ached. i've been pining for the eireann days lately, i just miss the place and the people so damn much. that spot was just like 'the woods behind the hotel' in kinsale, only without the omnipresent bramble.

all in all omenapuumaa was a lot like 'my forest' but it was more concentrated and intense, and obviously not in use for forestry. the nature trail was very clear and marked well, but uneven in places and you needed to watch your step a lot. i didn't take many photos towards the end, i was kind of exhausted. we were in there for six hours! i definitely want to go back, and visit during different seasons. it's going to be amazing in spring.

the rats have always enjoyed crowberries, they had them when they were babies and now they are ripening again. they don't even like bilberries as much! they just eat the insides and leave the peels, like they do with everything, even cucumber. savu nibbled a bit on the birch polypore i gave him, but didn't shred it to bits like i assumed he would. the rest of it will be made into decoction and tincture soon.

above is one of my favourite photos of savu and sysi, ever. i had the window open and some flies found their way inside, intriguing my boys into a mix of curiosity and suspicion. i just love how they are both so in the moment. i mean, rats usually are, but it's not always so easy to capture. and just look at sysi's little hands, they make the shot i think.

this is typically the scenario when i start a work day. sysi needs to be scratched and savu must chew everything. usually they soon retreat to their 'room' ie. cage for their nap time and i can actually get something done, but at some point one of the assistants will remind me it's time to take a break. i have a big study for working in, but sometimes it's even more distracting to be in the other room, listening for squabbles and other alarming sounds.

two weeks ago, my brother and his girlfriend visited again, and we went to the cairns of sammallahdenmäki, a unesco world heritage site nearby. it was my second visit but this time the weather was much nicer and i wasn't dead tired, so i enjoyed it a lot more. i must admit i was sidetracked by berries and mushrooms on several occasions, even found three little ceps amidst the lichen. i haven't been to the woods at all, despite all my intentions and growing desperation. things keep getting in the way and it is killing me, especially when it's been such an amazing early autumn here.

this bear sculpture in front of a cafe had apparently been vandalized, which is awful, but it was such a stark contrast to the idyllic surroundings i couldn't help but find it funny.

we also visited the maritime museum of rauma, which was much more impressive than i was prepared for and provided some tidbits of family history, too. they have a digital archive of local, old ships and their crew lists, and one of my great grandfathers appeared on a few documents, revealing a bit of his dating history, as he departed the ship first on a port near my great grandmother's home town and later retired entirely, due to 'getting marrid'. they bought a little farmhouse near my forest home and started a family which, among other relatives, produced my grandpa, also a sailor, and then my mother, and me. but even aside personal interests, the museum really brings the seafaring life to life. can't wait to have new visitors so i can show them...

that busy week culminated to a saturday evening spent on the cliffs in the woods by the sea with some friends. we had a little fire going in a sheltered spot (it was very windy), and watched the fireworks. it was the end of summer and boating season, the venetian evening. even the clouds cleared away and revealed thousands of stars, and having had the foresight to wear thermal leggings, it was a warm, lovely night for me. i really needed it, having not done any summery things like that this year.

five days of social activities in a row turned out to be too much for my sensitive nerves, though, and this week has been one of fever, migraine and joint pains. the rats have both given me gray hairs, too. sysi by falling and hurting himself, although he is fine now, and savu waking me last night, biting the cage bars in apparent discomfort. he ate a lot of apple seeds yesterday, having snatched a core, so i gave him a crumb of charcoal just in case. they can be poisonous to a small animal, apple seeds, but the charcoal may have made it hard for him to poop. i really don't know what caused his jumpy night terror, but he is still very tired, even though he did make big, black pellets in the litter box this morning. so the worry never ends with these critters, but they are worth it all.

this photo is from a week ago, when sysi and savu fell asleep on the shelf under my bedside table because i washed the whole cage and it took ages. savu pulled a paper hanky out of the package to sleep on...

it's a rainy sunday over here. it's good for mushrooms and hopefully i will finally be able to spend some time in the woods next week... i don't have any bilberries in the freezer yet and it worries me. in the meantime, thought it would be fun to share some glimpses of very easygoing rat 'training' or playtime. my fave part might be the very beginning...

savu already knows 'spin' very well but 'round' is still in the works. last night he did it flawlessly, but that might have been because he was competing with sysi for the treats. i'm just using my tongue as a clicker to cue him of successful performance. not sure if he actually knows what it means, even, but he does know to expect treats eventually! pay attention to the ears, how he starts to anticipate the next request mid-munch already.

also, my heart melts from the little whorls of fur on his little knees.

one of my friends has moved into a beautiful house in the old town, and has two cherry trees in the yard, drooping with fruit. i was overjoyed when he invited me to pick the remains, our own cherries aren't doing so well and these are a different variety. super juicy and sour, there are now fillings for six pies in my freezer... and some extra in the fridge for smoothies. bought choco-coconut milk just for that purpose. what a great time of the year august is, easily my favourite month.

evenings are getting darker, and do so earlier. it's still warm but not impossibly hot, and there's that unmistakeable scent in the air... autumn is near. if not here already? my plans of mushrooming last weekend got mowed down by social activities (seeing a play, my mom's birthday, picking and pitting cherries) and other chores as well as the general time flying by, but i will definitely have to go to the forest home this week, and possibly check some nearby woods, too. there could be a bit more rain... and i could not be an exhausted wreck all the time, but damn it, i will enjoy the season.

hopefully it's a wonder filled time of the year for you, too.

and here we are, wading ankle-deep into august already... how long has the summer been, three or four days, huh? it really feels like i blinked and missed it, although i know we had seemingly endless hot days, which mostly kept me hidden indoors. hints of autumn are in the air already, and that suits me just fine. today is a proper rainy day at long last, and this weekend will be devoted to mushroom hunting. i've had luck with chanterelles and russulas already, but hoping to stock up a bit for winter as well, and maybe find something new and exciting...

when i moved this spring, i looked at the bare bushes in the yard, thinking "please be white currant" sort of sarcastically, because i always dreamed of having them in the garden but no cuttings ever took root. i also wasn't sure which side of the property line they fell, but one day my landlord asked me if i wanted to pick the berries, and sure enough, one big shrub is a white currant! it's basically a red currant without pigment, but they are so otherwordly and delicate looking, and not at all bland tasting. there's loads and i can have them all. combined with the red ones from my allotment, i could easily fill my tiny freezer, but i'm leaving room for other berries, too. so my diet is heavy on the currants at the moment. blackcurrants will soon ripen, too...

other pale things, pinesap and coral fungus from the forest home, spotted on my last visit. these guys are pretty reliable, even though the pinesap may not appear each year. this one was remarkably white, usually they are quite yellow-y. the coral fungus' exact species is unknown to me but it's not a known edible, sadly, because it looks so inviting i just want to take a bite. also, i'm pretty much certain this is what my brains look like.

i've done a decorative thing in the apartment! i've been quite slack with putting the place in order but my brother & sister-in-common-law visited last weekend so i spruced things up a little. this shelf is one of the things i own that makes a home feel like home. the pilea that i almost killed has thrived in the new home, with better light, and it has a little friend in the pot, too, a tiny rat-tail plant cutting i snipped from my friends' house while cat sitting last year. for the longest time i completely forgot what it was or where it came from. sorry for the dark photo, because this house really has the most amazing light.

my wee runty rattie really has grown up. they are both tiny in my eyes, but having visitors exclaim how huge the rats are has convinced me. we are also all a bit flubbery around the sides, so everyone's eating habits will be under scrutiny and exercise must be added to our busy schedules of munching away at treats...yes, everyone includes yours truly. the dreaded fall of starting anew is upon us. i'm hoping to begin yoga classes after a good ten years in between, just some very gentle hatha lessons, but something more rigorous would be a good idea, too. we'll see...

the lace week was a bit of a blur and i was too focused on being social to take many photos. i saw an exhibition of historical dressmaking, which reminded me how much i like empire cut dresses, although my current obsession is the edwardian silhouette. i saw some new hidden yards in the old town, bought very reasonably priced sour cherries and enjoyed a gluten free grilled veg pizza, soon followed by the most gluten-filled vanilla custard donut, freshly made, which caused me trouble but no regrets. it's a once-a-year thing, one of my summer to-do follies. i ate a lot of cake and pie, and made amazing makizushi with marinated chanterelles.  there was a great, big, international food fair which i totally avoided, because it's just too much temptation for my wallet right now. also not a fan of sweaty crowds. there was a hobby horse show in a park i happened to walk through one day. wish that had been a thing when i was a kid. we just imagined the horses with my friend...

speaking of stuffed toys, here's sysi's best impression:

opium poppy seed heads from my garden allotment, courtesy of the neighbouring plot, from where they have spread. i've been cutting them before they go to seed so they don't fill the place up. wouldn't mind if they were white, my favourite,  but that particular level of magenta garishness with violet spots just isn't in my scheme of things. let's see if the poppies i actually sowed will ever make it this year... they are dark purple and ruffly like peonies. that's already quite extravagant for me.

we are having strange weather, hot and humid to the point where it's so misty it's kind of not hot anymore. i was taking my cardigan off and putting it back on again the whole time while picking redcurrants today. managed to burn my cheeks, so i am looking very glowing but feeling less than vigorous, still.

summer is a time for reading, if any, and the library has been very good to me lately. i've resorted to reading the flavia de luce mysteries as translations, since i never bought them in english as my own birthday gift last year. i hear there's to be a tv series and i'm cautiously looking forward to seeing it one day. awaiting reading, under a cake dome to protect it from the teeth of a certain rodent, is the autobiography of cheeta, the hollywood chimpanzee.

sysi looks like he might have been a silent film star in a past life. he is one handsome, cuddly bear, although he still hasn't become the lap rat i am hoping for. next week he will turn ten months old. i watched some videos from when the rats were younger, and even sysi was so small, although he was a big hunk even then... but savu was just a wee mouse! sysi weighs about 750 grams now and savu is somewhere between 630 and 640 grams. it's going to be a challenge to keep sysi from getting fat once he becomes a lazy old man. so far there's been enough fuss each day to keep him reasonably lean, but i know i should play with them both more. i should also keep moving more, but that's a whole another story.